Last Updated on October 1, 2014.
Bullies never start with physical violence. There are three different levels to bullying. Tiger Schulmann’s “Bully Shield” Seminar explains these levels and demonstrates these levels. Learn how to stop a bully in the first level, before it gets violent using the greatest weapon we have which is your mind. Contact us now to sign up for our October 18th free seminar.
If a bully was truly confident in themselves they would never start bullying kids in the first place. If they were really confident they would join my karate classes and challenge themselves just like all the other kids. We know from experience that bullies are not confident in themselves which is usually why they start bullying in the first place. They are looking for something to make other kids like them or think they are cool in order to boost their confidence. This is why a bully would never start his bullying with violence. The first stage of bullying is the “test the water” stage. Allow me to explain.
Have you ever been to the beach before? Did you run up to the water and let it touch your toes only to run away because it was very cold? That is exactly what the first stage is. The bully is afraid, a lot more afraid than the victim. They don’t know if their mark is going to stand up for themselves or allow fear to paralyze them into submission. Obviously they are hoping for the latter. Our seminar teaches kids how to be assertive in the situation and stop it before it escalates to violence. We like to think the best self defense is the one you never have to use.
Some examples of level one bullying are making fun of someone when they make a mistake, saying mean things or calling a person mean names and telling lies about a person to others behind their back. If the bully was confronted here than it would never go any further. By standing up for yourself you take all the power away from the bully. They will back down and most likely never try it again. It must however be done the right way. Tone of voice and body language work wonders in this instance. A strong demeanor is key. Speaking loudly and clear projects strength. You must make eye contact and stand tall. Any sign of weakness will convince the bully you are faking and they will push forward until you break. You must have confidence in your words and be willing to back them up. You must be confident but where does this confidence come from? I’ll tell you.
“You don’t want the first time you you’ve ever been hit to be in a fight against a bully. Training martial arts gives kids experience of a violent situation in a controlled environment where they know they will be safe. Now if they are forced to defend them selves they will be much more prepared and confident.”
Training in martial arts and karate builds confidence through positive achievement. After all it is only through our achievements that real confidence is built. Plus with the ability to protect yourself comes a sense of security. Knowing that you have been in stressful and possibly violent situations before and came out unscathed will allow you to block out any fear and do what needs to be done. Although if you have never been there and this situation is the first time you will never be able to stand up the right way. You head will slouch and your words will be quiet and mumbled. The bully will pick up on this and continue to bully you. If you speak clearly and loud you will be taken more seriously. If you stand tall and don’t look away then the bully will break.
We must not depend on the bully backing down simply by telling them to. We must be prepared to back up our words if pushed to that point. Kids that train karate, jiu-jitsu or kickboxing have fought before. They have fought other kids that do martial arts and and have no doubt that this bully can not be as tough as the kids they’ve trained with. It’s this experience that provides them the tool of confidence to handle bullies the right way. Come to my seminar and see for yourself.